Moving on

Hello everyone.  It's been a while...

I didn't know how to start everything.  I thought I'd be able to post something good for everyone.  But, I guess things wouldn't always turn out the way we want it to be.  And yes.  We failed our IVF.

It seems like an eternity of pain, questions and uncertainty when Dr. M told us that it's negative.  Like all his words fall into a limbo like I don't know what has happened and what I've gone through.  It's like an abyss - where no words to describe what I've been feeling that time.

I mustered all my courage to fight back the tears that's already welling at the edge of my eyes.  Everything became unbearable that I broke down when we reach the car.  I don't know where to start anymore. 

I'm human and pain wouldn't just go away.  It's been days before I've learned how to deal with the pain of losing to this battle once more.  I'm taking this one step at a time trying to understand what I did wrong and what should I do next.  I'm moving on.

Just a short anecdote.  Recently,  I went out with one of my few good friends.  She didn't know what we has gone through.  But when I told her everything she was lost for words.  Told me that she admires how I handled the situation and glad that I still have my sanity after all.  Like her I also didn't know what to say. 

I also want to share with everyone my little angel, Lucas.

My dear child.  I cried when I knew you fought and when I knew you were gone. I know God has a reason that He didn't gave you to us.  Maybe God wants you to be with Him and He will give us back another angel when it is time.  Please whisper to God our prayers.  Goodbye my little one until we meet again.

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Waiting

PHOTO COURTESY OF

http://www.123rf.com/photo_6837814_lovely-chinese-baby.html

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Counting the days

Hello world!

A brief update of what has happened lately.

 Day 3 (May 12) - CD3 -  3rd day of menses and it's our follow up at Kato.  Dra. Perillo did the ultrasound (Thank God!) then the hormones check (estradiol, luteinizing hormone, progesterone and fsh) - the results are normal.  Femara was prescribed to be taken once a day (after dinner) for 5 days, then follow up is on Day 10 to see if there's a leading follicle.  It is needed because I have to ovulate (as they would like to mimic the stages until the embryo reaches blastocyst). 

Day 10 (May 19) - We only needed one and that's what I've got! The leading follicle measures 15.5mm.  Dra. Perillo said that my endometrial lining is very promising  No hormones test for this day as the follicle is still not big enough. We'll have to wait for Day 13.

Day 13 (May 22) - Dr. M did the ultrasound - follicle now measures 18.8mm, with trilaminar endometrium, my hormones are also normal. Dr. M told me to use Suprecur (to trigger ovulation.  It's the same nasal spray that I used last cycle.  Each bottle is viable within 6 months upon usage and contains 12 sprays.  You'll be able to utilize 3 sprays per cycle.)

Here's our expenses post-retrieval.

For the details of last cycles expenses you may check on this link.

Hopefully our transfer will push through sometime next week.  In God's will!

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My Miracle Blastocyst

Another memorable day for us - April 22^nd as it’s my egg retrieval.  This is such a big event as this is the first step that may make or break our much awaited BFP.

We arrived at Kato so early (that the guard’s the first employee present).

Kato’s pretty impressive as I said before when it comes to their steps and procedures. 

I love that they give importance on hygiene and they literally love anything that is pink and purple.  And this transpires upto their pink disposal lab gown!

A DAY IN MY JOURNEY WITH KATO

Everything felt normal when I'm still at the Recovery Room with my husband but reality hits me when the nurse was leading me into the Operating Room and seeing the door open with both doctors present, with others I have no knowledge of.  This is it! The dreadful bed where you have to lie down like a specimen.  With the thought of my worst enemy waiting for me – THE SPECULUM.  I didnt get to feel the anaesthesia administration, I was only told by Dr. M that we're starting.  Since it was a local anesthesia,  I was awake the entire procedure and I've got the privilege to witness the action.  I grew 4 dominant follicles on my left ovary.  But only 2 eggs were aspirated and luckily both are mature and are ready for fertilization.  

You’ll be given a schedule on when to follow up for your embies status.

Here’s our schedule and the events there after.

Day 1 (April 23) – Fertilization Check – One embryo was fertilized and the other one they have to stop due to abnormal fertilization (3PN).

Day 2 (April 24) – Cleavage and transfer schedule – it cleaves but is slow growing.

Day 5 (April 27) – Slow growing 4 cell embryo (I’m already crying with desperation that my embryo will arrest at any moment).  We were told to check again the following day.

Day 6 (April 28) – my slow growing 4 celled embryo has worked double, triple time to live and become a hatching blastocyst! (I cried so hard I couldn't remember what the embryologist was telling me.  Until I said goodbye.  It's a very touching moment as we were on our way to Church when I made the call). 😇🙏. 

We went back to Kato last May 2^nd for the embryologist consultation.   We spoke with Elaine and she provided us with our little angel's pictures. She told us that the embryo has worked his way to live and she even told us to give our angel "a name".  Her advice is to be healthy and happy while waiting for the transfer. 

We're still waiting for THE DAY.  We just had our follow up last May 12.  Next one is on May 19. 

I may not be pregnant yet.  But what has happened to our embryo is indeed a miracle. And I'm so thankful for being so blessed as I've found my solace strengthening my devotion to Padre Pio and St. Jude.

And I’m also thankful to my virtual sisters (Hazel and Cel).  

They are very patient and helpful with all my questions. 

Girls my prayers are always with you and I can never thank you enough BFP or not.  

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The Spermies

I want to share with everyone about my husband's armies.  How they fluctuate and eventually stand strong after almost a year of battling lethargy and disobedience.  

A brief history.  His problems were concentrated with count, liquefaction and motility.  Years ago when we started this journey an OB-GYN and a friend of ours told my husband to take Spirulina (which can be bought at Healthy Options) to help improve motility issues.  True to his word motility has increased not immediately but accordingly.  Then told him to drink plenty of water (not bottled juices or sodas or whatever).  Then the major major SOYA.  Which will help improve his sperm liquefaction and count respectively. 

Actually my husband is a bit of pain in you know where... As he despises drinking water (he has this great desire for anything colored and bottled.) He is also too forgetful of his supplements as he said it is aiding him in gaining the unwanted weight.  Which I think is a BIG FAT LIE! (As he is eating like a full meal each time he saw an opportunity.)

And then reality bites...

That we are not getting any younger...

We are childless...

And it takes two to TANGO!

And so it was only last year that he truly cooperated when we really focused on having a baby.  (Though, still no baby in sight.)

Here's the compilation of his count from last year and just April this year.

So what did we do (or I force him to do!)

The diet - though I'm still lenient on this (as I love to cook and who else would eat it but HIM.)  But I'm focusing more on feeding him veggies and fruits.  Even if it takes us an hour to munch just a slice of watermelon...

Exercise - Treadmill everyday if the schedule permits or if not at most is 3x a week.

Water -  I monitor the water intake.  He has this Starbucks tumbler that he needs to fill in multiple times a day.

Supplements - He's been religiously taking Vitamin E, Zinc and Selenium for a year now. 

MY MAGIC WORDS - "YOU KNOW YOU NEED TO DO ALL OF THESE AS I CANNOT PRODUCE A CHILD ALONE."

Also, I want to mention about Acupuncture.  I don't know if it helps him improve his count but after a month of doing it.  His count rises to 185.5M which is the first in his countless sperm analyses. 

And most of all we always say the same prayer.

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Monday Blues

I'm one of the many who's greatly affected by the so called "Monday Blues".  And my husband has scheduled our acupuncture sessions every Monday morning.  Another thing is,  I just can't understand why all our doctor's appointment is in the morning when it's too dreadful to wake up and drag myself in the bathroom.

 I guess there is nothing much that I can do...

Here's what has happened to our session:

Still Sis. Regina told me that my body is cold.  I know why it's happening because I haven't stop my desire for anything that's cold especially now that the weather is too hot and humid that cold water is a MUST!  Yes, blame it on the weather!

Here's my list of Do's and Dont's.

Sleep early
Exercise more (don't use the brain too much)
Eat right (drink a lot of soup)
Drink Ginger Tea (No Prescription Teas for now.  She said she won't interfere more to this stimulated cycle)
Always wear socks

Anything cold

Caffeinated drinks (coffee and soda)

Cold fruits (melon, watermelon and the likes)

Playing games on phone, IPad and the likes

I hope I can be more obedient.  I hope I'd be able to follow the do's and just cease the dont's.

Btw, tomorrow's my follow up at KATO and my LAT re-test.  Got to start early again.  For now I'd sleep and thank the Lord and pray that tomorrow's gonna be better!

 

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Follow up CD6

April 12 - CD6

I had my follow up today to check my hormones and the ultrasound.

And I made a graph based on both results.

Dr. Mendiola said that my hormones are normal.  The follicles on my ovaries are growing but they need a little push.  He said that in a normal cycle - there would be a single dominant follicle that needs to meet with a sperm in order for the fertilization to take place.  In a stimulated Clomiphene/Clomid cycle - nothing would be different.  Either one or two follicles would be present.

And for us to have a better yield we need the aid of injectables.  He prescribed 2 shots of 75iu Gonal F, (one was injected at the facility and the other I brought home and is to be injected on Sunday) and hopefully we'll see more proud follicles soon. 

We spent a total of P12,208 for today's visit. 

Here's the breakdown:

And I've learned something interesting today.  If the building is PEZA (Philippine Economic Zone Authority) Accredited and one of the couple is a foreign national then sales is deemed to be non-vatable. (This was because of my curiosity over a P360 difference for one vial of Gonal F with another patient.)

This it for now folks!.

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Kato Repro Bio Center

So we decided to do our IVF here.  If we don't get lucky to have the much awaited BFP then off we'll go to Taiwan and I already have a hospital in mind.

Our journey to BFP.  Hopefully, it's with KATO.

April 7 - AF Day 1
April 9 - AF Day 3 (KATO Consultation)

KATO is very systemic about everything.  Staffs are very approachable and are very willing answer to your queries.  A very Japanese approach.

When we approach the reception we were courteously accommodated and was handed a small paper to fill in details about me and my hubby.  Then took our picture.  Btw,  please be ready with your TIN (Tax Identification Number) as they are particular about it only if you are a local resident. 

I'm really amazed that you'll go to 2 different ways of registration.

1. Hard copy - the medical questionnaire that you need to fill up and return to the receptionist
2. Electronic - the same questionnaire through an IPAD. (You'll be handed 2 actually 3 gadgets.  2 IPADs for the couple and a mini tablet if you want to know more about the KATO's facilities).

After the registration we were asked in the treatment room where in the nurse would check the vital signs. 

We came in a couple of minutes late from 11:30am.  We're supposed to wait for the next clinic schedule at 2:00pm.  And yet again, I'm surprise to hear from the receptionist that Dr. Mendiola would be seeing us now.  Wow! it's the first time that we won't be waiting for a doctor!

Q&A with Dr. Mendiola was worthwhile.  My husband was so pleased about what he has learned about the menstrual cycle, how the hormone works for conception and how my body would not be bombarded with ovulation stimulating medications in order for me to produce the precious eggs.

Part of KATO's protocol is to religiously monitor the hormones.  

Here's the result of my hormone tests at Day 3.  Nothing exceeded any limits.  Nothing is lower than expected.  In short, it's NORMAL!

ELPFBP RESULT

The least that I expected was an ultrasound on day 3 of my menses! Nooooo!!!


And here's the result.

And the result said nothing as in nothing about me having PCOS (Polycystic Ovaries)! Finally! 

I guess the stars are working accordingly.  No need to do a sperm analysis as my husband had his  recently.  I thought results would just be handed over.  But! Dr. Mendiola called us again to discuss them! They're getting me really impressed! Really! He said that both results are good.  And the way he sees it I'm not PCOS.  Lovely! (He did the ultrasound himself and this is the first time that my ultrasound was performed by a male doctor).

What's the plan?

He gave me Clomiphene Citrate (Serophene) to be taken at night after dinner for 10 days.  Our follow up is on CD6 (April 12), for another set of hormone tests.  I'm not sure if there'll be another ultrasound. 





I love the order of their approach with the patients.  You'll never go home uninformed.  They'll literally provide you with answers to your yet to ask questions.  Plus, I love the fact that all that you can see in the place is pink and purple.  So cute!

Another thing was they discussed the steps and the approximation of costs for the IVF.

KATO's IVF COST

Appointment card will be given at the end of the visit (one for each couple). 

For the details on the total cost here's the receipt of our initial visit.

Also I forgot to mention that you'll be provided with your Patient ID Card with the ID #. And I think all the transactions done with them are stored under the ID#. 

So this is all for now.  I'll update after our second consultation! God speed! Ciao!

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Acupuncture

Hello everyone!  A lot of things to do lately.  

Then I hate the fact that BLOGGER doesn't work on MAC anymore.  I mean you can see your blog but can't edit post. Thank God my hubby doesn't use the same operating system or else I'm doomed!

Anyways,  what has happened lately.  We now finally went to see Sis. Regina and finally had acupuncture!  We already had 2 sessions with her. 

Here's what I was told on the first session (March 21):

• Very cold hands and feet means I'm so stressed.
• I need to sleep early at 11pm (as the brain uses kidney essence and when the brain is working so much it uses much of this essence that nothing is left for reproduction).  
• Stop drinking sodas and cold water. 

Here are our pictures during the first session. 

With what I have been advised it's only the soda's that I have been avoiding.  I just can't get rid of the cold water just yet especially now that it's summer.

  Also I'm now back to doing threadmills everyday for 30 minutes.  And been trying to avoid meat as much as possible.  Thank God for Bodhi.  (For a list of vegetarian restaurants near you may check on this link.)




We'll have a weekly acupuncture session with Sis. Regina until we get pregnant!

Here are photos of our 2nd session.

NO HEAT LAMP THIS TIME

6 NEEDLES TO THE HEAD

Sis. Regina asked us to bring our medical records on our next visit. She also advises that I should have follicle monitoring on day 17 and 18 of my menses.  Hubby will have his sperm analysis this coming Friday. 

My period is delayed again and I'm not pregnant.  I just tested this morning.  Period should have appeared last Monday.

So this is it for now. 

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